Saturday, September 22, 2012

What To Expect When A Celebrity Is Expecting

Ryan Reynolds married Blake Lively two weeks ago. I have to admit, I never saw it coming. I knew they had been dating, but I had no idea they were considering marriage. After hearing the news, I spent five minutes wondering how this could have slipped under my radar. Then I spent another five minutes wondering how I could care that this slipped under my radar.

I'm incredibly happy for both of them, especially Ryan. He was the Sexiest Man Alive in 2010. (As determined by People magazine.) Last year that title was awarded to Bradley Cooper. So despite the fact that Ryan somehow became less sexy over the past two years, he still managed to snag a beautiful woman in Blake Lively. Congratulations to you, Ryan. I love a good underdog story.

(I'm assuming Ryan won't be named Sexiest Man Alive this year; only four celebrities have won the title twice: Richard Gere, Brad Pitt, George Clooney and Johnny Depp. I didn't even have to rely on Wikipedia for that tidbit, thank you very much.)

And congratulations to Blake, too. It's a coincidence, but her rise to superstardom began the same year Ryan was named Sexiest Man Alive. It's true that she appeared in The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants in 2005, and has had a major role in TV's Gossip Girl since 2007, but her most credible work -- The Town, Savages, her relationship with Leonardo DiCaprio -- has come since 2010.

I should mention that she also had a role in the 2011 movie Green Lantern, which I've been told is not one of the better superhero films released in recent years. (Just another in a series of comic book movie lectures I've been subjected to by my friends.) But it did star her future husband, Ryan, so it wasn't a total loss. For her, not for the people who paid $12 to see the movie in the theater.

Regardless of how you feel about Blake's films, they always have a top-notch cast. I call this phenomenon the Blake Effect. Let's review. The Town: Ben Affleck, Jeremy Renner, Jon Hamm. Green Lantern: Ryan, Peter Sarsgaard, Mark Strong, Tim Robbins. Savages: Salma Hayek, John Travolta, Benicio Del Toro. And what the heck, the 2008 sequel The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2: America Ferrera, Alexis Bledel, Amber Tamblyn, Traveling Pants.

Blake is a smart woman. She works with an A-list crowd. And now she's married to an A-lister. Good for her.

I was going to wish her congratulations on her pregnancy, too, but it turned out to be a false alarm. There was a report that she might be with child because she was supposedly eating a lot more in the days after the wedding. But her rep denies Blake is pregnant. So either her diet hasn't changed at all since she got married, or she's just been hungrier than usual lately.

My mind operates at a completely different level from the sources who speak to the magazines and websites that report celebrity pregnancy rumors. When I hear that an actress is eating food, I just assume she's nourishing her body so she can remain alive. But when a "witness" or "insider" discovers that an actress is eating food, it often means one of two things: "Is She Pregnant?" or "SHE IS PREGNANT!"

Similarly, when an actress is spotted drinking bottled water, it may be because she's thirsty. Again, that would be my suspicion. Or it could be because "she's pregnant so she can't drink alcohol. She isn't getting any younger, and she didn't want to put off starting a family any longer, so now was the time. She'll make a great mom!"

I've never equated drinking water to pregnancy. But what do I know, I'm not a woman. I'm drinking bottled water as I'm typing this. Maybe I'm pregnant and don't even realize it. If I am, I'm sure I'll hear about it eventually from a source close to me.

I do know Blake is not pregnant. I just hope she and Ryan enjoy the early stages of their marriage. Ryan isn't getting any sexier.