Saturday, May 4, 2013

How I Met Your Mother (Online)

How I Met Your Mother has been renewed for a ninth and final season. So, in the next year, we'll finally learn who the "mother" is.

I've only seen a handful of episodes of How I Met Your Mother, though I did find the show to be funny. I am, however, looking forward to the big reveal. In case you're unfamiliar with the premise of the show, the main character, Ted, recounts to his kids in the year 2030 how he met their mother. Each episode is a flashback narrated by Ted, whose voice is provided by Bob Saget.

If I were a writer for the show -- and again, I'm not an avid viewer -- I would steer this story line in one of two directions:

-- We learn in the finale that the mother -- it doesn't matter who it is -- is deceased. To help raise Ted's (Bob Saget's) kids, his brother-in-law and his best friend move into his home, setting up a reboot of Full House.  A new Uncle Jesse. A new Uncle Joey. A new Full House. Full circle for Bob Saget.

-- The mother is Suri Cruise.

What I like about either scenario is that it would reward the viewer with an unexpected but memorable payoff to the story line. If you're a fan who believes my ideas are too far-fetched, well, you've already invested eight years of your life in a show that wants us to believe it takes a father that long to tell his kids how he met their mother. Remember, it only took a 30-second theme song to explain how a man, a woman, and six kids all became the Brady Bunch.

I will say that after all these years on the air, How I Met Your Mother has made me realize I will, in all likelihood, never have a great "how I met your mother" story for my future children. I've never once had a relationship begin because I struck up a conversation with a stranger on the subway, or because I was introduced to an interesting woman at a party. Pretty much every romance I've experienced in my life evolved in a very organic, and boring, way. Certainly not in a way that could be retold in primetime.

Nearly every date I've had in the last three years was arranged through a website. If I marry in the not-so-distant future, it would likely be to a woman whom I've yet to discover on Not that that would be a problem for me, but it wouldn't exactly inspire a captivating tale for my children.

"Kids, I met your mom on the Internet. Her username was CutieGal1982. Hers was the 3,592nd profile I clicked on. I winked at her, she winked back, we got hitched. The end."

That story could only be stretched out on TV for two seasons, three seasons tops. And only with guest appearances from John Stamos or Suri Cruise.