Tiny Bits of Nonsense: October 2014

Here is the October 2014 edition of "Tiny Bits of Nonsense," featuring 10 of my tweets for the month:

This is the worst time of year to be a pumpkin.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 3, 2014

I buy picture frames in the hopes that one day I'll find a stock photo of myself inside one of them. What a neat surprise that would be.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 9, 2014

I just walked out on a bad Netflix movie. Now I can't go back home until it's finished.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 2, 2014

It can't be healthy for The Avengers to avenge things as often as they do.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 29, 2014

It's unfortunate that the only retail store that's hiring geniuses right now is Apple.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 24, 2014

TV needs a morning talk show that more accurately reflects how I feel when I wake up. Something like, "5 More Minutes, America."
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 3, 2014

I once tried out for the "Jeopardy!" College Tournament. I was disqualified because I didn't own a sweatshirt with my school's name on it.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 17, 2014

I wonder if a celebrity has ever made an appearance on a talk show simply because he wanted a fresh mug of water to drink.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 14, 2014

Hard to believe that the T-shirt section in Hot Topic was again passed over for a nomination for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 14, 2014

I'll know time travel is possible when I enter a date from the past into Priceline's flight search and I don't receive an error message.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 22, 2014

And, as a special treat, here are some Halloween-themed tweets:

I will spend most of my Halloween trying to figure out how many bite-size Snickers equals 1 full Snickers, and then eating about 50 of them.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 17, 2013

I've been playing a lot of Jenga lately, but with Kit-Kat bars. So, kids, if I don't have candy for you this #Halloween, that's why.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 23, 2013

I've stocked up on rocks for Halloween, just in case Charlie Brown comes to my house for trick-or-treating.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 22, 2014

Spending the day collecting pennies in parking lots. You can never have too many for the trick-or-treaters on Halloween.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) September 29, 2014

"Blah!" -- A vampire after eating candy corn on Halloween

— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 31, 2014

I did the Monster Mash, too, but I choose not to write a song about it.

— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 31, 2014

Asked the cashier at the Halloween store whether it carries a "disinterested Halloween store employee" costume. Ended up buying his clothes.
— Shane (@myemptythoughts) October 25, 2013

Other bits of nonsense:
September 2014
August 2014
July 2014
June 2014
May 2014
April 2014
March 2014